While I’m here, I realize I should give at least a brief update on my “that explains…” post from a few weeks back. I am almost certain at this point that there’s no way in hell Mike would ever be diagnosed w/AS. That said, he definitely shows many AS-type traits. We’ve no interest in pursuing a diagnosis (it wouldn’t change our benefits, so why bother?), and instead we’re spending time on an as-needed basis considering how his AS traits impact our relationship.

It’s enlightening and maddening. On thing about having started grad school though (official as of the 1st!), I have no time to really muse over it. Maybe I’ve just had entirely too much time on my hands? Whatever the case, I could see some AS poking its nasty head up this weekend while I “enjoyed” a round of puke-and-poop brought to me courtesy of Maya. Mike was trying to be supportive, but just didn’t quite “get” what it was I might need while I was racing back/forth to the bathroom and dealing with a 100+ fever. I’m learning how to spell things out in much more literal, concrete terms. It sucks, and sometimes I feel like a child throwing a temper tantrum: I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO DO THIS!!!

At the same time, I spent some q/t with my cousin over the T-Day weekend. She’s in the middle of a divorce from a guy who was (and is, from what we can tell) lying about everything in his life, was irresponsible about money, and basically used her — all while justifying it to himself as defensible. When I see things like this, I am reminded how absolutely lucky I am that — even though he often isn’t sure how I need it shown to me — Mike loves me completely, is responsible (some might say anal) about finances, is committed to me and our family, and will do whatever it takes to make our marriage work. I need to remind myself of that sometimes.

At what point do you decide what percentage of “I have it all” is enough?

Okay, two more assignments to finish today for week 1 of grad school…guess I’d better get with it rather than contemplating my navel.

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